LIFE WITHOUT LEO

By Friday, June 27, 2014 82 Permalink

Thursday afternoon my heart was shattered when what started out as a simple cough on Sunday, led us to the vet on Monday, turned for the worst on Wed with labored breathing.

I took Leo back to the vet on Thursday, to rush him to the hospital and less than two hours later he collapsed.

Specifics right now are not that important to me, perhaps at a later date I will be able to share to help someone else. For now – the best I can tell you is that he succumbed to a nasty viral bacteria (airborne in nature) which did horrible things to his lungs in a very short period of time.

My baby is gone…

8604447364_788be011f7_o

I don’t know what to do…

Leo just celebrated his fourth birthday in May. Weighing in at about 98 pounds, he was the largest – most awkward dog I had ever fallen in love with. He stole my heart at first glance.

Leo put the “Groovy” in Goldendoodles. All my “Wilson” posts were true and accurate because he and his beloved soccer balls (I believe there were at least 11 in his life time) were inseparable.

Right now nothing makes sense. I’m not functioning too well and neither is the rest of the family, including Harley. He was able to say goodbye, and I believe he understood, but his rhythm is off.

He is very sad, and I’m trying to help him.

I will need sometime to work through this loss. For the last several years when a tragedy hit home, I would turn to my writing. This time half of my “Groovy Goldendoodles” is gone, so I don’t know what to write. I cannot fathom life without Leo.

I don’t know what to do…

We’ll be back, but right now – I just don’t know when….

 Cathy & Harley 

 

82 Comments
  • Amy Shojai, CABC
    June 27, 2014

    Oh no! I am so very sorry, how horrible. Sending you and the whole family prayers for peace {{{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}}}}}}}

  • Jessica @ YouDidWhatWithYourWeiner
    June 27, 2014

    Oh Cathy, I am so sorry. Nothing I can say will take the hurt away but please know that I really get the feeling of loss and my thoughts are with you.

  • Kate
    June 27, 2014

    Cathy, I so sorry for your loss. No words can heal the pain you and your incredible family are enduring. I wish I could find the right thing to say. You are an in refie woman who can move mountains and if I know you, you will do that in time in honor of sweet Leo. You will use your pain to help others. There is a lesson behind every event that happens to us in life. God had bigger plans for Leo and I believe you are his voice of reason. I wish I could hug you in person right now. Be strong for Harley. We love you. I’m praying for healing strength for all of you. Xoxo

  • Shawn
    June 27, 2014

    There are no words, I am so, so very sorry,

  • Melissa & Truffles
    June 27, 2014

    I don’t even know what to say except that I am so, so sorry.

  • Michele cannon
    June 27, 2014

    I am so sorry, I know exactly how you feel. We lost our Jake in the matter of 3 hours from a spleen tumor in October 2013. The house is till not the same without 100 pounds of doodle energy.

  • Michele cannon
    June 27, 2014

    Michele cannon

    I am so sorry, I know exactly how you feel. We lost our Jake in the matter of 3 hours from a spleen tumor in October 2013. The house is still not the same without 100 pounds of doodle energy

  • Robin
    June 27, 2014

    Cathy, I am without words. Not a usual state of being for me. This is unfathomable – I know how much you love your boys and you and Harley must be in a state of shock. But you will get through this – know that your Doodle family is here for you. One day this will make sense but I understand that day is not today. I am shedding tears for all of you – Leo will be missed by all of us. Love to you and Harley – XOXOXOXO

  • Lucy and AnnaBelle's Mom
    June 27, 2014

    Cathy, I am so sorry to hear this news. Losing one of my girls was something I could never ever imagine. But then it became a reality a year ago in March to cancer. That being said, we had the time to prepare and say our goodbyes and it was still excruciating. Since that time every time I see a story like this it just breaks my heart that it happened so quickly. Nothing will make sense for awhile. When we lost Sophie people immediately started talking to us about other doodles that were available. While I won’t do that, I will leave you with one thought … it is really hard to be sad with a puppy in the house. When the time is right for you I know that Leo will bring another sweet furry friend into your family. Please know that our thoughts and prayers are with you!

  • Stacey
    June 27, 2014

    I don’t know you or your family or pups but I’m crying with you over the loss of your beautiful Leo. I pray for peace and comfort for you all.

  • Pamela Casey
    June 27, 2014

    I am thinking about you and the whole family. This is just so sad, but I know that God will be with you and your family as you make your way through this ordeal. I will be praying for you, but let me know if you need anything!

  • Kimberly Gauthier
    June 27, 2014

    Cathy, I am so so very sorry. I just saw this now. My heart is breaking for you. I’m so sorry.

  • Stacey
    June 27, 2014

    I have tears streaming down my face for your loss because I have been where you are at and know how much it hurts. We are approaching the year anniversary of Toby’s passing to the Rainbow Bridge and it still hurts but it does get better with time.
    My deepest sympathies and condolences go out to you and your family especially Harley. May the memories of Leo give everyone peace and comfort in the days ahead.

  • Claudette Pope
    June 27, 2014

    Cathy, my heart is breaking for you and your family. There are no words that can be said to ease your pain. I am praying that you can find that ray of Sunshine that Harley will bring to you. Take your time to post, we all understand. God Bless you Cathy. You and your boys brought so much joy to so many people. Until later, we love you and will continue to pray your strength.
    claudette

  • Reilly and Chip
    June 27, 2014

    Oh Cathy and Harley we are so very sorry for your loss. So young to be gone. There’s nothing thatvw could say to heal your pain but we grieve along side with you. Leo will be missed by everyone.

    Love and hugs
    Reilly and Chip

  • Emma
    June 27, 2014

    Oh my gosh! We are in shock! This is such a terrible loss. We feel for you and send you our prayers. We can’t imagine how heartbroken you must be. Absolutely unbelievable. Don’t even know what to say we are so shocked. You are in our thoughts.

  • Lisa Bregant
    June 27, 2014

    I’m so, so sorry. You and your family are in my prayers.

  • Anne Cavoto
    June 27, 2014

    I’m in total shock and disbelief. My heart aches for you and Harley. You are always in my prayers.

  • Kim
    June 27, 2014

    Cathy, I am so sorry. I heard last night and my heart is breaking for you. I’ve been where you are and if you need to talk, just ask the pet resort for my #. I’ve come to realize dogs are put in our lives for a reason and they are never with us long enough. I lost my heart dog Fred a couple years ago and even though I have many others, I’m just getting back into the activities I enjoyed doing with him. Just remember Leo is always with you especially in your heart. Hugs

  • Jessica Shipman | Beagles and Bargains
    June 27, 2014

    Cathy and Harley my heart is breaking. Leo was truly an inspirational dog who always put a smile on my face. He will be incredibly missed. I am so sorry for your loss. You and your entire family are in our thoughts.

  • Katy
    June 27, 2014

    I am in shock and disbelief. Thinking of you and your family. We love you so much here at OTPR. You are our family. Leo will always and forever be in our hearts. Rest in peace our sweet boy, may Heaven have an endless supply of Wilson’s.

  • Claire
    June 27, 2014

    My heart breaks for you.
    We also lost our Andrei at age 3, totally unexpectedly, and i know how hard it is.
    Especially when you have to help a grieving brother at the same time.

  • Alix Mitchell
    June 27, 2014

    I am so, so sorry for your loss. I know no words can help the pain, but you are in my thoughts. So so sorry for you and your family.

  • Chastity
    June 27, 2014

    I am in tears… I froze for an unknown amount of time when I received the call. I just don’t understand. I’m broken and so hurt that I didn’t get a chance to say goodbye. Why do these things happen? God brings you such joy and without warning takes it like that. I know He has a reason for it all but it never helps the pain. I am so sorry for your loss Ms. Cathy … So sorry.

    Chas

  • Lonnie Shapiro
    June 27, 2014

    Cathy, I am so very sorry and my heart is hurting for all of you. Sending love and prayers your way with big hugs too. Rest in peace sweet Leo.

  • DashLilly
    June 27, 2014

    Oh My God! Oh Cathy, I am so sorry. I don’t believe it. I just don’t believe it. I am weeping at my desk at work. I miss Leo so very much. So very, very, very much. You are in my prayers. Deirdre, Dash and Lilly

  • Aimee @ Irresistible Pets
    June 27, 2014

    I’m crying with you right now. I’m so sorry to hear about Leo. Losing a pet is a terrible pain like no other. Big hugs for you right now xoxo

  • Carma Poodale
    June 27, 2014

    I have no words. My prayers are with you for strength. I am so sorry.

  • Elaine
    June 27, 2014

    Cathy, Harley and Family –

    Oh no! My heart is heavy and am at loss for words. Prayers are all I can offer you right now.

  • Carol Bryant
    June 27, 2014

    Cathy – My heart is broken and I am literally sitting here shaking. I cannot even imagine to know what you are going through. I am here if you need to talk. All of our deepest sympathies from our family.

  • Julianne
    June 27, 2014

    I am so sorry for your loss. I don’t even know what to say since it is so shocking. Your family is in our thoughts.

  • Susan from Life with Dogs and Cats
    June 27, 2014

    So, so, so sorry. I lost my Rosie when she was four. Too young. Too devastating. Sending you many thoughts, prayers, wags, purrs and love. There are no words; just know that every one of us are here to support you.

    –Wags (and purrs) from Life with Dogs and Cats

  • Nikki Stuhlmiller
    June 27, 2014

    Sending you lots of love, hugs and prayers. Im so sorry for your loss.

  • Kelly
    June 27, 2014

    Miss Cathy, the loss of a member of the family is such a tragedy. Please know our hearts, thoughts and prayers go out to you all!!!

  • Joolz
    June 27, 2014

    Shocked to read your sad news about Leo.
    I know something of what you are going through having just suffered a sudden loss of one of my 2 dogs only a couple of weeks ago. One minute she was ok. Twelve hours later I was in bits as her system had just shut down & I was left bereft! I’m upset again now thinking about it.
    Physically my Peppi was only wee & altho not very outgoing, as she had been a terrible abuse case before I got her, she was a cute, funny, sensitive loving little dog. She has left a huge hole in my heart. I miss her & her little foibles. (I now get to go to the bathroom alone again)
    Their time with us is a gift and is never long enough.
    All you can do at the moment is hug Harley who must also be missing Leo & your Family & remember you gave Leo a fabulous life ( not all dogs are so lucky!) and he loved you unreservedly in return.

  • Lindsay
    June 27, 2014

    Cathy,

    I am so, so sorry to read this. I wish there were something I could say. Know that many people are thinking of you.

  • Leslie & Halas
    June 27, 2014

    I’m so sorry for the loss of your sweet Leo.

  • Yvonne DiVita
    June 27, 2014

    This is so heartbreaking! When we lost our Chester so suddenly I didn’t know anything could hurt so bad. Losing a family member is so traumatic. I still see Chester here, and feel him with us. He was our precious boy and I know Leo will always be with you, too. We never stop missing them, do we?

  • Jennifer
    June 27, 2014

    I am so sorry for your pain, and the loss of your beloved Leo. I pray that Jesus wrap his loving arms around your family and give you peace .

  • Tom Collins
    June 27, 2014

    Oh, Cathy, I sit here in tears knowing you’re feeling as lost as we did with the sudden loss of our Chester in March. I feel for Harley, too, knowing how our Emily and Olive still sometimes seem to be looking for him and react when we say his name. I only hope you, too, find comfort in the outpouring of love and support from this wonderful community of friends. Tom

  • Chloe
    June 27, 2014

    I am so very sorry. Sending you hugs and keeping you in my thoughts. I wish I had better words for your broken heart. <3

  • Yvonne Smith
    June 27, 2014

    Cathy,
    Leo loved you unconditionally softening your life with sweetness and affection. Such treasures can never be forgotten. We all here in my home feel sorry for your loss and our prayers go out to you and Harley and the family.

  • Jen
    June 27, 2014

    Cathy I am so sorry. I can only imagine what you and your family are going through. My heart breaks for you all. Please let me know if there is anything I can do for you.

  • Lara Elizabeth
    June 27, 2014

    Cathy, I am so incredibly sorry to hear of the sudden loss of your Groovy boy. It is always a difficult thing to lose a beloved dog but the shock of losing one so young is another blow entirely. My heart is with you.

  • Rachel Sheppard
    June 27, 2014

    Cathy, I am so deeply sorry to hear of Leo’s passing. My heart breaks for you and your family. Many of us know what it is like to lose a pet, but having them taken from us suddenly without warning is unfathomable, especially when they are such a central part of our lives. I hope you find peace in knowing that you gave Leo a wonderful life full of love and joy and lots of time with you. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. Take care.

  • Christine & Riley
    June 27, 2014

    Ohh… Cathy, my heart goes out to you. I know what this time can be like for you…please know that we all loved Leo very much. I am so shocked by this 🙁

    For You and Leo, Rainbow Bridge:

    By the edge of a wood, at the foot of a hill, is a lush, green meadow where time stands still. Where the friends of man and woman do run, when their time on earth is over and done.

    For here, between this world and the next, is a place where each beloved creature finds rest. On this golden land, they wait and they lay, till the Rainbow Bridge they cross over one day.

    No more do they suffer, in pain or in sadness, for here they are whole, their lives filled with gladness. Their limbs are restored, their health renewed, their bodies have healed, with strength imbued.

    They romp through the grass, without even a care, until one day they start, and sniff at the air. All ears prick forward, eyes dart front and back, then all of a sudden one breaks from the pack.

    For just at that instant, their eyes have met; Together again both person an pet. So they rush to each other, these friends from long past, the time of their parting is over at last.

    The sadness they felt while they were apart, has turned into joy once more in each heart. They embrace with a love that will last forever, and then side-by-side, they cross over together…

  • Kia
    June 27, 2014

    Oh no no no! I am so sorry for your loss! I will keep you in my prayers!

  • Jen | DOGthusiast | StylishCanine
    June 27, 2014

    I’m so, so sorry to hear about Leo, Cathy. Absolutely heartbroken. In the time we worked together, and of course through your blog, I felt like I knew him in person. You absolutely show your love through your writing and shared your wonderful dogs with the world – and Leo was such a lucky dog to have one of the most loving humans I know. Please call me any time if you want to talk. I lost Mikey suddenly to disease a few years ago, I know your world must be upside down and not make any sense. But please know I’m here if you ever need to talk, any time, you know my number.

  • Ann Staub
    June 27, 2014

    What? 🙁 My heart just sank… I’m terribly sorry Cathy. This seems so sudden. Please take your time for both you and Harley healing. My thoughts are with you. <3

  • Kate
    June 27, 2014

    I have been thinking of you, Harley and the family since I heard the news. Sending you all our love.

  • Paige turner
    June 27, 2014

    I am crying with you about Leo. We lost our precious baby last week. We are still devastated, so we can empathize with you fully. Our hearts are broken for you and Leo. It’s not fair that such wonderful, gentle souls don’t live the longest. We are so sad and so sorry. Cathy. You have the support, love and care of the Goldendoodle community surrounding you and grieving with you. We can all understand that special bond that you had with Leo. Sending our hugs and love to you.

  • Denise Jordan-Williams
    June 27, 2014

    Oh My God, Cathy. I am so very sorry. I cannot amagine what you and your family are going through. You guys are in my prayers and thoughts. Honestly, if there is anything that I can do for you. Please call me. I love you guys.

    Denise

  • laverne bennett
    June 27, 2014

    Cathy,Junnie and Harley, I’m speechless the news of Leo passing has been very hard for me. I know you loved him unconditionally and words of sympathy doesn’t ease the pain.I know your heart is heavy, but remember God will dry the tears and mend the broken heart. Trust in God and lean on his grace and mercy.Love you guys to the moon back.You know you can call anytime I’ll be here if you need me.

  • Kathy
    June 27, 2014

    I’m sorry seems hardly enough. There are no words. My heart is breaking along with yours. I hope you and Harley are ok, and remember the good times.

  • Chelsea Price
    June 27, 2014

    Cathy, I am so sorry for your loss. Losing a pet is one of the toughest things a person can ever go through. Please know that my thoughts are with you, and we are all here for you. <3

  • Sheila
    June 27, 2014

    Cathy, I am so truly sorry to read this about Leo.
    In fact I just can’t believe what I read is true. I have no words that can ease this pain you are feeling, or the hole in your heart. Leo was most certainly a special dog, as is Harley. They both have brought so much joy and love to many people.
    Even though I never physically met Leo, I felt close to him, as well as Harley. How could I not. They had so many tales to tell. Leo and Wilson together were a pair like no other, another reason to love Leo.
    I will keep your family in my prayers, and ask god to help ease your family’s pain, as well as Harley’s. He most certainly is grieving too.
    Stay strong my friend.
    Hugs and Prayers
    love <3

    Sheila

  • slimdoggy
    June 27, 2014

    Cathy, I’m so very sorry. We have all grown to love Leo and his antics as well. I’m so sad for you and your family. here are no words of comfort that feel adequate other than I’m sorry. Hug Harley extra hard.

  • MaryBeth
    June 27, 2014

    I am so sorry for your loss. My heart goes out to you and your family. My deepest sympathies. With lots of hugs and love

  • Aunt Ann
    June 27, 2014

    Cathy,

    My heart is broken. I have been in a shallow place since we talk last night. To hear about Leo and watch you my dear friend hurt at such a deep level is almost unbearable. Baby Girl, I feel your pain and I mourn with you and I pray for YOU and Harley.

    Thank you for writing in your pain.

    I LOVE YOU and I will always be here for you.

    LEO’s Aunt Ann

  • Deborah T McConnell
    June 27, 2014

    To My Sister, Leo was with us for such a short time. But during that time he gave so much love & fun. Mainly because of all the love and care you poured into him. For that he was Blessed and so were you. I know your heart is broken and I can’t say anything to make it better. I am so sorry for your loss. I am glad that Leo Bennett was a part of our family even for such a short time. May you find comfort in all the joy he brought to you and so many others during his short life. God Bless You, Lee, Tiffany, Jamie & Harley. I love you more. Deborah & Chester

  • Abby
    June 27, 2014

    There are no words, but Cathy and Harley, know that we are thinking about you and fortunate that we met Leo. It is so hard to lose a 4 legged family member.

  • Ollie
    June 27, 2014

    Oh, Stanley, I don’t have the words to express how sad I am for you. You and the family will get through this together. Your friends will give you the support you need. I know that right now memories will never take the place of that warm body, and the pain of loss is sharp and deep. Always remember that earth has no sorrow that heaven cannot heal.

  • Mason and Marshall
    June 27, 2014

    There is nothing sadder then losing leo my best friend.
    Just when Ms. Cathy said we would be together all summer {sniff} it happened.I wish leo was still alive I will not forget what happened.And hope nothing happens to Harley. Who knows if you’ll get another dog that looks just like leo. you could name him leo too.

  • Caren Gittleman
    June 28, 2014

    OH DEAR GOD!! When I read the title, I said “No, can’t be, must be a joke or something” and then I read on…..Oh Cathy….I don’t even have the words to convey how my heart is hurting for you and your entire family. Saying I’m sorry just isn’t enough. I know how your dogs are your soul…….my heart is just breaking. I wish you lived nearby so I could give you a hug and support in person. I am so deeply sorry. Keeping you and your family in my heart and prayers…….we all loved Leo….this is just so unfair……..I am in total shock and immersed in sadness. xoxo

  • Tonya
    June 28, 2014

    Hey Butta,
    You knocked the wind out of me today, and when I caught my breath, all I could say was “I’m sorry”. I can only imagine how difficult this is for you, and I pray that in time you will be alright. You have so many amazing memories and photos to remind you of the joy Leo brought into your life. And your wonderful blogs brought joy to a lot of people, as well. Take care and I’ll be in touch…love you!

  • Andrea
    June 28, 2014

    So sorry for your loss. We are thinking of you.

  • Theresa
    June 28, 2014

    I’ve never read your blog until today. I got here by way of Keep theTail Wagging. But, I wanted to express my sympathy. Having lost my 14 year old Pekingese last November, I feel your pain and understand your loss. I wish you peace during this most difficult time.

  • Playful Kitty
    June 28, 2014

    I am so sorry to hear about this. My heart is truly broken for you. I wish I knew what to say. I would be exactly the same way you are right now if I was in your position. Don’t feel bad about taking the time you need to be with your family. If you need a shoulder, feel free talk to me. I will be praying for you, Harley, and everyone affected by the loss.

  • Jennifer and Tony
    June 29, 2014

    We are so sad for your loss. We keep you all in our thoughts.

  • Kathy
    June 30, 2014

    Hey Cat, we r so so sorry to hear about Leo. We feel your pain. We lost Jasper about 3 weeks ago. He ran out the side door and right into the street and was struck by a passing car. U and your family have our deepest sympathy Cathy. I pray that the awesome memories u guys have of Leo and Wilson will in time ease the pain. Hang in there my friend. Love & Hugs, Kathy, Bosco and Ivory

  • Kathy
    June 30, 2014

    We too will miss Leo’s and reading about adventures and viewing his pics. A BIG HUG for Harley.

  • Karen
    June 30, 2014

    Cathy and Lee, our hearts are breaking over this sad news. I know how tough this is. Leo was a gem and you are the best Doodle Mom. You two were blessed to have each other although your time together was short. I know Mila will be sad. We share your heartbreak. If you need anything at all call me. We are in our way back from vacation today. Love and sympathy to you, Lee and your family. Karen and Dean

  • Pastor
    June 30, 2014

    Cathy,
    I just heard this terrible news. I know how close you are to the boys and were to Leo. Yet, Leo is not really gone; he shall forever remain in your heart. All animals and human beings possess an essence of life call a “soul.” For this reason, the saying is true, “All dogs go to heaven.” Who’s to say, there might be a Leo2 out there.
    Stay blessed — Pastor !

  • Brittany
    July 1, 2014

    From everyone at Spencer the Goldendoodle’s blog our hearts go out to you and your family during this tough time. We will continue to keep you and your family in our prayers.

  • PetBox
    July 1, 2014

    My heart aches for you and your family! Our thoughts and prayers go out to you from the PetBox family.

    -Dusty, PetBox

  • Dee
    July 2, 2014

    My Friend,

    I just read this!

    From my heart to yours!

    Hugs,

    Dee

  • Jackie Bouchard
    July 2, 2014

    Oh no! I’m stunned and so saddened to see this news! I know too well how devastating this is. It is SO hard to lose a furry family member, since they are an almost constant presence in our lives. He will always be with you in your heart. I hope that you and Harley can help each other through this most difficult time. Sending big hugs.
    Jackie

  • Terrie
    July 2, 2014

    Sorry to hear about your dog. Sounds like he had kennel cough .

  • Melvin Dr. Phil Brown
    July 4, 2014

    Oprah, I am extremely sorry at the lost of my friend Leo!! He was always a ball of excitement when I would come to visit. Although your car is in broken and need of repair just know that God will help your Drive again!

  • Joanne McDonald
    July 26, 2014

    Cathy, I just read about Leo. I’m so sorry for you and your family. It’s so very hard to loss a furry family member. I’ve always loved following Leo, Harley, and you on DK and FB.

    Many hugs.
    Joanne

    • Cathy Bennett
      July 26, 2014

      Thank you Joanne, we are doing our best to adjust…

  • DZ Dogs
    March 13, 2015

    I am very sorry that I never got to meet you Leo.. <3 I'm sure he's happy knowing that you are happy, and he would have loved your new puppy. 🙂

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *