PART 2 OF A NEVER ENDING SERIES
March 8th I met my 13 lb. bundle of love. Twenty two days later I penned the first chapter of what I like to call “Diary of a Middle Aged Puppy Mom.”
My disclaimer remains the same, I still adore my little love bug, but being on the tail end of my 50’s vs. the front makes a significant difference with a puppy in the house. I’m experiencing things I never thought much about – let alone remember.
And after I posted the first Diary of a Middle Aged Puppy Mom, I found out – I am not alone. #Ilovemyfriends
So, grab your coffee, tea or orange juice and enjoy our most recent comedy of errors…
I titled this one –
CHASING TAIL CAN GET YOU KILLED
and in this case – I’m talking ALL of us!
Our house is conveniently located in the middle of the cul-de-sac so we don’t see much action in regards to traffic.
Our corner however intersects with a road used as a “pass-through” for the neighborhood. At times (more often than we’d like), this one road can resemble a drag strip for Nascar qualifications.
Never EVER do we flirt with danger and go anywhere near the corner w/o our leashes. #itstherule
Directly across that busy street lives this hot little number (a Pomeranian named “Coco”) who Harley has – on occasion – tried to “date” when we’re on one of our many walks.
Once the Spring weather settled in we’ve spotted her out alone, strutting her stuff during the late afternoon hours. #doingherthing
Twice when she was strolling the streets, I let her humans know she was “out and about” on her own. #theyweregrateful
On this particular afternoon, Coco decided to extend her solo adventure down our way.
This is what happened…
I was in the garage, wrestling with Jax and his collar. Harley waited patiently for his turn before we began our walk. I had poop bags in my hand, and because Jax only gives me a three second warning before he’ll either pee all over my floor and/or my foot, my Sketchers weren’t on properly.
I only slipped the front of my feet in with the intent of getting the heels inside where they belonged before we left. #importantfact #rememberthis
Something caught my attention. Something moved past my house. Unfortunately Harley saw it too. He stood up, and started to move. I called his name as I struggled with the collar clamp on a wiggling Jax.
Unlike his nature, Harley ignored me and continued down the driveway, picking up speed along the way. I’m still not sure “what” he or I saw, but it certainly peeked his interest because he was gaining serious distance from me.
As soon as I cleared the car, I saw her – Coco! What in the doodle was she doing down here? She took one glance at Harley and like a jack rabbit she flew up the street.
There is absodoodletutely no reason for me to tell you what Harley did next. #youguessedit
Now remember at the time Coco strolled by, I was:
- trying to clamp Jax’s collar
- my shoes weren’t completely on
- I had empty poop bags in my hand
My response was impulsive. I reacted with the first thought that popped into my mind. I hollered from the depths of my lungs for Harley and started running after him. #draggingJax
With one hand on Jax’s leash, and the other still clenching the poop bags – I managed (in full stride I might add) to:
- release the bags into the air like confetti
- throw the free hand behind me, snatch the back of my sneaker shoe, and get it around my heel before the foot hit the ground.
Performing this trick (still running) not once – but twice (for each shoe)! #Americasgottalent
But as the second foot was about to hit the ground, we had another malfunction. That collar clamp? Yep, it never really got fastened all the way. So now
Shrek Jax was on the loose. #cantmakethisup
I dropped the dog-less leash, and now I’m hauling (you know what), as fast as I can.
At that precise moment I realized at my age you can’t yell and run at the same time. Impossible to do both. #stoplaughing
FACT: I’m not as athletic as I used to be!
When I think about top ranking female track and field athletes such as:
- Jackie Joyner-Kersee
- Allyson Felix
- Marion Jones
- Gail Devers, and many more
Cathy Bennett’s name isn’t on that list.
But I’ve got to keep running because I’ve got to save my Boys from that monster called an “intersection.”
I’m one and half houses from the corner. Coco’s already in the middle of the street, Harley’s less than three feet behind her, and Jax was gaining on him.
I ran as fast as I could. My yell was down to a pathetic squeak. My heart felt twelve times its size, and it hurt with each beat. I was so exhausted I was slowing down. Couldn’t slow down, had to keep going. I flailed my arms much like a duck trying to lift itself out of the water. I thought it would give me extra speed. #lookingcrazy
- Coco made it across the street.
- Harley made it across the street.
- Jax made it across the street.
Praise God – I made it across the street!
As I sat on the curb, heaving like a heavyweight boxer in the ninth round, I wasn’t sure if I was going to throw up or pass out.
And just like a typical mother, I hugged my boys close trying not to cry and suddenly felt the urge to pick Jax up and use him to beat Harley #justbeinghonest
I refrained from any acts of violence, waited until my heart returned to a non life threatening pace, got my composure and took my Boys home.
Harley knew he was in trouble so he immediately put himself to bed. Jax was clueless and since he never got to finish his walk, he peed on my floor. #notmyfoot
My shins were on fire for days afterwards. My knee still clicks at times when I try to run up the stairs, and my shoulder throbs when I reach for something above my head. But my boys are safe 🙂
Whatever happened to Coco?
I paid her humans a little visit the following day. I was neighborly, kind, but all about the business. I told them what had occurred the day before. I expressed concern that Coco is out too often, and now that she’s comfortable crossing a busy street her survival rate wasn’t looking too good if this continued.
They were appreciative, and I haven’t seen her since.
As for the residents of Doodleville – we’ve adjusted our routine slightly:
- the sneaker shoes go on all the way BEFORE leaving the house
- we leash up in the laundry room
- got new collars without clamps 🙂
While being a middle aged puppy mom is slightly “different” from what I remember, I wouldn’t trade it for the world, but I doubt seriously if I would/could do it again either 🙂 #tellingthetruth
Be kind to someone and as always, thank you for sharing us with your friends!
CONTINUE READING AND FIND OUT HOW A MIDDLE AGED PUPPY MOM DEALS WITH CRATES